Today has been a day full of thinking for me. God takes us down many paths, and often we don't understand them for some time. I'm in one of those times. My thought at the moment is to why God places a desire on your heart, and then tells you to wait. I'm not very good at waiting, especially when I've been waiting for years. I have a passion to serve God in being in ministry for Him. One way I was able to do this is through a non-profit coffee shop that is open to teenagers only. They pay $2 to come in and then all the drinks & food are free. And we bring in a live Christian band to perform each time we're open. All in all it's a really cool ministry w/ great opportunity to open doors w/ teens and to keep them in a fun, safe environment where there isn't the pressures of sex, drugs & alcohol. I love this ministry! And yet now all those who started the ministry w/ me have backed down. My passion may be on hold for now...but that is my ministry at the church I attend. So now the question becomes...do I look for a new church? a new ministry? or do I just wait for the door to open again or for more people to come on board w/ me? I seriously don't know. I do know that I want to make an emotional decision and find a new church, or at least try some others out for a few weeks...but that isn't necessarily what God has for me. And yet at the same time, maybe this is the chance for me to find a new church and meet some new people. Being single w/ all my friends either married or in serious relationships that are heading towards marriage I'm being left in the dust. And that is ok b/c it's what happens in life. And yet I want to be able to join my friends in this area of life...yet there isn't any potential at my church...so do I go where the fish are? Or hope that God brings someone along. No one's come along in over a year...so how long do you sit there? I really don't know. I hate not knowing. But it's patience that God asks of us, and I'm seeming to have many lessons on this right now...I'm teaching a serious on it in Prison at the moment. And when we teach something, God takes us through it so we understand it better ourselves. I'm not picking this subject again! :D But isall good. God is in control and He will guide me and provide the wisdom that I need as I need it. I just need to trust Him and allow Him to work in my life. That being said I feel a little better. Kinda. Tata for now.
T
