It seems like longer and longer in between blog posts...I have been running around like crazy since Christmas and so much has happened in the last few weeks, I just don't know where to start. Utah was sweet. I love seeing my Dad and Heather(step-mom). They are just so awesome, loving and caring. My Dad and I are like carbon copies of each other, it's scary really. We finish each others jokes. Well it was odd time during those 4 days I was out there because I was also listening to a series on pornography by a Pastor named Tim Lucas from Liquid Church. I downloaded it from itunes through the podcasts thing. Well I know that it is taboo to talk about this stuff or make mention of it to the public (as if it weren't obvious that it has prevaded nearly every aspect of our culture.) Porn is actually derived from the greek word Pornea which is the broadest term for sexual sin there is in that language. Pornea has infected our culture. Look around us, it's everywhere; TV, ads, accepted cultural practices....the list could go on really. Last night one of my roomates had to turn of the TV because a blatent sex scene just came on. Now granted this was cable but it was not one of those "pay channels". It was a major cable network. To be honest it doesn't really surprise me. If you look at the statistics of Porn use they are staggering. Porn is now a 12 billion dollar industry in the US. It grosses 47 billion outside the US. Makes us better right? no. Over half of christian men admit to struggling with pornography. Around 40% that are in vocational ministry admit that porn is a personal issue. And let me tell you right now that porn is an addictive drug. I've seen it, I've done it. I was exposed to porn when I was 12. My friend and I found his brothers olld magazines and video tapes. If this offends you or tarnishes your image of me well then so be it. I will not pretend that this does not play a factor in my life simply to help people have a positive outlook on who I am. I am accountable to God for what I have seen and done and he sent Christ to die for my sin, thus by clinging to the power of the cross I am forgiven, not to be dragged down to the depths of shame and guilt but to be lifted up clean and pure as the driven snow as a child of the living God. And so here I am before you, YES I have seen it and YES I struggled with it for years upon years. Even now there is the temptation, but I choose God as I have to every day. The thing about Porn is that is all about getting a high. The thrill of the forbidden coupled with someone exposed for your own pleasure. You have the power with just the turn of a page or a click of the mouse. And that is the hook. But the problem with high's is that you have to go higher the next time. In achieving this high a person must view things that are more shocking, more vile than the previous day. And it becomes an addiction. It becomes deadly to your work, to your MARRIAGE, to your family, to your RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD. Porn will destroy a marriage. The most obvious consequence would be a spouse discovering the other engaged in their "private viewing." But here is another aspect that I think most people don't think about. Sexual sin darkens the mind; it callouses the heart. Porn twists and distorts the relationship between a man and a woman so that it becomes about bringing pleasure to oneself. Sex in marriage is a beautiful thing. I can;t wait till the day, because it was created by God as an act of worship! It was made pleasurable and pleasing, but only in a certain context. Put a fire in the fire place and it will warm the whole room. Put a fire outside the fire place and it will consume and destroy everything in its path(VB). Also as a side note, women take up 30% of pornography viewing. And that number is growing. Also women are more likely to act out their fantasies (i.e. affairs, multiple partners) than men are. If all of this is repulsive to you, then good, it should be. This stuff has been eating away at people of our generation for years. It carries the weight of shame, guilt, a feeling of dirtiness that cannot be made clean. I really could write more on all of this and I might later, but I believe this is long enough. There is hope. If anyone is addicted or just wants to get some help, feel free to message me ot also check out xxxchurch.com. Don't worry it's a clean site. They established this site to help people breakout from their addiction. Let me give you also this truth: a little porn in NOT okay. A little Porn is NOT okay. A little porn is NOT okay. If you just dabble in it, you know without paying for anything and say to yourself, "I'm okay, not an addiction." You are headed for a fall and you will fall hard. We have to be radical in how we approach this and how we pursue purity. I desire purity so greatly, because I am saving myself for my wife and also that I can please God and be pleasing in his sight.