IT ALL COMES DOWN TO CHOICES
A mini-Bible study by Kathryn Kenney

Why have I believed the lie of shyness for so long? Because the enemy had me convinced that I was not as good as everyone else. He started feeding me this lie when I was ten years old and had to start fifth grade at a new school in a little town. I was the “new kid” who wasn’t related to anyone there and didn’t know anyone and, OH MY! how the enemy LOVES to use children to hurt and tear down other children.

It was about three or four years later that I accepted Christ as my Savior. But even then, I still believed the enemy’s lie that I was ‘shy’. I believed that lie for thirty-seven years! Finally, on July 20, 2006 the Lord was able to break through that lie and get to me – or I guess I should say, I allowed Him to finally get through to me. He had wanted me to know from day one that I was special and that I was important to Him; but, instead, I kept believing the lie of the enemy that God couldn’t love me because I wasn’t as ‘good’ as everyone else.

People, friends, would tell me, “You need to get some self-confidence” but how could I do that? Self-confidence is “a belief in one’s own ability, power, judgment, etc.” The enemy had me convinced that I had no ability or power. I have even been guilty of telling others that they need to have self-confidence; but, I now realize that none of us need SELF-confidence. Yes! We need CONFIDENCE, which, according to The New Combined Bible Dictionary & Concordance, is “full trust, belief in the reliability of a person or thing”. And according to Strong’s #3982, the word confidence, as an intransitive verb, means “to be convinced, be confident, have inward certainty, trust.” But I can’t have confidence in MYSELF…my confidence must be in GOD.

I can not find one place in the Bible where it says anything about having confidence in one’s self; but I did find where it tells me to have confidence in GOD, in the LORD, in HIM! And I found scripture that specifically tells me NOT to have confidence or trust in MAN.

 5 By awesome deeds in righteousness You will answer us,
         O God of our salvation,
         You who are the confidence of all the ends of the earth,
         And of the far-off seas;

5 Thus says the LORD:
      “Cursed is the man who trusts in man
      And makes flesh his strength,
      Whose heart departs from the LORD.

3 For we are the circumcision, who worship God in the Spirit, rejoice in Christ Jesus, and have no confidence in the flesh,

 4 Blessed is that man who makes the LORD his trust,
         And does not respect the proud, nor such as turn aside to lies.

 1 Woe to those who go down to Egypt for help,
      And rely on horses,
      Who trust in chariots because they are many,
      And in horsemen because they are very strong,
      But who do not look to the Holy One of Israel,
      Nor seek the LORD!

 8 It is better to trust in the LORD
         Than to put confidence in man.
 9 It is better to trust in the LORD
         Than to put confidence in princes.

13 When you cry out,
      Let your collection of idols deliver you.
      But the wind will carry them all away,
      A breath will take them.
      But he who puts his trust in Me shall possess the land,
      And shall inherit My holy mountain.”

14a Now this is the confidence that we have in Him…

So you see, it isn’t SELF-confidence that I need – it is GOD-confidence! And once I truly have that GOD-confidence, then I can have the boldness that He wants me to have to do HIS work. He did not create me to always be in doubt or to be afraid or timid or shy. He created me to have CONFIDENCE IN HIM and to be BOLD IN HIM! Just as these scriptures tell me…

7a For God has not given us a spirit of fear,

7a “Be strong and courageous; do not be afraid nor dismayed…”

6 Be strong and of good courage, do not fear nor be afraid of them; for the LORD your God, He is the One who goes with you. He will not leave you nor forsake you.”

12 in whom we have boldness and access with confidence through faith in Him.

1 The wicked flee when no one pursues,
      But the righteous are bold as a lion.

16 Let us therefore come boldly to the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy and find grace to help in time of need.

19 and for me, that utterance may be given to me, that I may open my mouth boldly to make known the mystery of the gospel,

6 So we may boldly say:
      “ The LORD is my helper;
      I will not fear.
      What can man do to me?^”

20 according to my earnest expectation and hope that in nothing I shall be ashamed, but with all boldness, as always, so now also Christ will be magnified in my body, whether by life or by death.

 19 Therefore, brethren, having boldness to enter the Holiest by the blood of Jesus,

So, if I put my trust and confidence IN HIM, then I no longer have to fear and I can be BOLD IN HIM!

Now, don’t think that since I’ve figured all that out it means that I am suddenly this “outgoing” person, who knows just what to say to people and knows just what to do at any given moment because that just isn’t the way it is at all! I told you, I believed the enemy’s lie for thirty-seven years so, even though I now understand it for the lie that it was, it is still hard to get past it. It is a constant daily struggle. In fact, sometimes it is a minute by minute struggle. I will sense that I’m supposed to do or say something and at the same time that lie rears its ugly head and says “But you’re not good enough. You know you’re always supposed to stay ‘behind the scenes’. No one wants to hear your silly ideas. You CAN’T do that” and on and on it goes.

However, now that I know what is going on, I have to recognize it and choose to ignore it. I have to start reminding myself of the scripture, GOD’S WORD, that tells me different. He has called me, not for my ability, but for my availability. I have to remind myself of what was recently pointed out to me from John 6:1-12. Jesus asked how can we feed all these people but the only answers He got was how they couldn’t feed the people. Then He took the little boy’s lunch and gave thanks and had the disciples “tote the baskets” of food to the people. Jesus will perform the miracles, if I am only willing to “tote the basket”.

So, every time I am faced with doubt or fear or the lie of shyness, I must remind myself of whose child I am and remember that HE IS IN ME and I must choose to be bold in him, tote my basket and let Him work the work that HE wants to accomplish in and through me. It really is all about choices.

Do you fight the lie of shyness? Does the enemy have you convinced that you aren’t good enough? I pray that this ‘study’ the Lord took me on will help you finally choose to overcome this. No, it isn’t easy, but next to what He did for me and for you, it isn’t anything!

I pray you will daily make the choice to “tote your basket” and let Him do the miracles!