Goldberg was bragging to his boss one day, "You know, I know everyone there
is to know. Just name someone, anyone, and I know them."
Tired of his boasting, his boss called his bluff, "OK, Goldberg, how about
Tom Cruise?"

"Sure, yes, Tom and I are old friends, and I can prove it." So
Goldberg and his boss fly out to Hollywood and knock on Tom Cruise's door, and
sure enough, Tom Cruise, shouts, "Goldberg! Great to see you! You and your
friend come right in and join me for lunch!"
Although impressed, Goldberg's boss is still sceptical. After they leave
Cruise's house, he tells Goldberg that he thinks Goldberg's knowing Cruise was
just lucky.

"No, no, just name anyone else," Goldberg says. "President
Bush," his boss quickly retorts.

"Yes," Goldberg says, "I know him, let's fly out to
Washington." And off they go. At the White House, Bush spots Goldberg on
the tour and motions him and his boss over, saying, "Goldberg, what a
surprise, I was just on my way to a meeting, but you and your friend come on
in. Let's have a cup of coffee first, and catch up." Well, the boss is
very shaken by now, but still not totally convinced. After they leave the White
House grounds, he expresses his doubts to Goldberg, who again implores him to
name anyone else.

"The Pope," his boss replies. "Sure!" says Goldberg.
"I've known the Pope a long time." So off they fly to Rome. Goldberg
and his boss are assembled with the masses in Vatican Square when Goldberg says,
"This will never work. I can't catch the Pope's eye among all these people.
Tell you what, I know all the guards so let me just go upstairs and I'll come
out on the balcony with the Pope." And he disappears into the crowd headed
toward the Vatican. Sure enough, half an hour later Goldberg emerges with the
Pope on the balcony. But by the time Goldberg returns, he finds that his boss
has had a heart attack and is surrounded by paramedics. Working his way to his
boss's side, Goldberg asks him,

"What happened?" His boss looks up and says, "I was doing fine
until you and the Pope came out on the balcony and the Japanese tourist next to
me asked,

"Who's that on the balcony with Goldberg!?"