Sex is easier than love, but we are not called to be children of sex are we? We are called to be children of love. I know I said I wasn't sure if I would write more on this topic but I decided I would go ahead. Let me start with the lyrics from a switchfoot song. Sex is currency She sells cars, She sells magazines Addictive bittersweet, crack your hands, with the hopeless nicotines Everyone's a lost romantic, Since our love became a kissing show Everyone's a cassanova, Come and pass me the mistletoe Everyone's been scared to death of dying here alone She, is easier to love It's easier to lie It's easier to fake and smile and brag It's easier leave It's easier to lie It's harder to face ourselves at night Feeling alone, What have we done? What is the monster we've become? Were is my soul? Sex is industry, The CEO, of corporate policy Skin-deep ministry, Suburban youth, hailing so-called liberty Every advertising antic, I've been a ways with a neon glow War and love become pedantic, We wage love with a mistletoe Everyone's been scared to death of dying here alone She, is easier to love It's easier to lie It's easier to fake and smile and brag We live in an age where sex is exploited for not even the purpose of having sex! Walk around the mall, watch some television and look for what sex is being used to sell. Sex is used to sell anything from cars to watches to clothes to….croissants and milk. What does croissants have to do with sex? Nothing. Advertisers are banking their entire promo on the idea that images of flesh or sexual innuendo will create the desire for something and that there product which is on the ad where you saw the image will become that object of lust. Lust is not confined to sex. Lust is the desire for and to consume something. It is insatiable. Do see what is happening? Sex has been devalued. Sex isn't even about sex anymore! It's about designer jeans and cologne. Yeah I'll have some sex or chocolate or whatever. The "sexual liberation" has devalued sex to marketing ploy, to an afternoon activity. No one "makes love" anymore. They have sex. I mean isn't the idea "making love" quaint now? I mean in out culture of instant pleasure and passion, isn't it just passé to hold sex as something sacred and valuable. I mean c'mon it's just sex. Perhaps you read my previous blog and said, "look I don't really struggle with this" or "I would never let it out of control" or "I don't even look at porn." But there are then those thoughts in the back of your mind, "Well maybe I did linger a little long at those ads" or do you occasionally drink in the form of a co-worker or someone you pass on the street? In C.S. Lewis' book The Great Divorce he describes a young man who was being tormented by a red lizard. The red lizard sits on his shoulder and taunts and mocks him. In this metaphor the red lizard represents any form of indwelling sin like lust. Well, one day an angel comes to him and tells the young man that he can be rid of the red lizard. At first the young man is overjoyed. He is so excited about getting rid of this awful lizard. The young man consents to the angel and the angel begins to glow with a fiery heat. The young man is taken aback as he realizes that the extermination of this lizard may not be entirely painless. The young man stops the angel and says, "Whoa, maybe we don't have to kill it, maybe…..we should wait for another time." The angel replied, "In this moment are all moments. Either you want the red lizard to live or you do not." And in that moment the red lizard realizing his life hangs in the balance starts to campaign for his own life, "Be careful! He can do what he says. He can kill me. One fatal word from you and he will. Then you will be without me forever! It's not natural. How could you live? You'll only be a sort-of ghost, not a real man like you are now. That angel doesn't understand, he is only a cold, bloodless abstract thing, it may be natural for him, but it isn't natural for us. I know there are no real pleasures, only dreams, but aren't they better than nothing? I'll be so good. I admit I have gone too far in the past, but I promise I won't do it again. I will give you nothing but nice, sweet dreams; all sweet and fresh and almost innocent. Those two words capture how most believers tolerate sexual sin. Most of us say, "Well it's not like I am sleeping with my boyfriend." Or "I'm not seducing my neighbor's wife." It's okay as long as it only affects me right? No. Sexual sin is considered especially heinous because of its unique characteristic. In this moment a man or woman is not sinning against someone else, but they sin against their own body. And a common quote from Christ, that seems to be less and less common, "But I tell you whosoever looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery (Matt. 5)." It's already happened. Sexual sin of the mind is equally as grievous as physical sin; it just does not carry with it the physical consequences. Make no mistake, both twist and distort our hearts and souls. And Jesus continues with a radical teaching that if you sin with your right hand to cut off, if you sin with your right eye to gouge it out, for it is better to lose one's eye than to lose one's soul. What are your top temptations? What are the things that hint that you are more conformed to our culture than to Christ? Is it romance novels? Is it weekly viewings? We have to be radical! But what would I do without my TV? What would I do without internet? What would I do without the little hits of flesh that I see every day? Jesus said take 'em out. If you struggle on the internet download software and move the computer out of your bedroom! Cancel the Maxim subscription, I know it does have really good articles. Throw out the movies, cancel the cable, attack the sin that is attacking you! Where is your weakness? What are you holding onto and why? If you have a chance look at Ephesians 4:17-24. Paul is writing to the Christians at Ephesus. In fact I'll put it here: As a follower of the Lord, I order you to stop living like stupid, godless people. Their minds are in the dark, and they are stubborn and ignorant and have missed out on the life that comes from God. They no longer have any feelings about what is right, and they are so greedy that they do all kinds of indecent things. But that isn't what you were taught about Jesus Christ. He is the truth, and you heard about him and learned about him. You were told that your foolish desires will destroy you and that you must give up your old way of life with all its bad habits. Let the Spirit change your way of thinking and make you into a new person. You were created to be like God, and so you must please him and be truly holy. This is a modern translation. Paul here insists on these Christians not to live like everyone else in the world because people that are of the world don't get it! I mean seriously, do you look around at our world today and see people who have it all together? Even just relationally left to ourselves we will screw everything up. And as our society spirals down into the pleasures of the flesh, we never stop to think at what cost we make out pursuit. Paul makes four observations about sexual sin that we can take away: 1) Porn/lust/sexual immorality darkens the mind. The darkened mind has no recognition of what is light rather it fears the light because the light destroys the very substance that the mind has become: depraved, fleshly, lustful, arrogant, hateful, wrathful, etc. As I said before Porn also darkens, twists and distorts our view of sex. Sex becomes about self gratification rather than the most intimate act between two people that reflects the intimate nature of God. 2) Sexual immorality desensitizes us to evil things. Remember the firestorm of that A & F Quarterly? Or the Calvin Kline ads of the late 90's that stirred such anger and outrage from the public? The sad truth of our time is that porn has been accepted by most and tolerated by all. 3) Continual exposure to porn calluses the heart. A callus is created by continual shaving or piercing of the skin. Over time the skin comes back harder and harder until we feel nothing. Given enough time porn or sexual immorality will callus the heart towards God and the holy spirit so much that we could not hear what he has to say even if we wanted to. 4) Continual exposure will ultimately lead to the surrender and collapse of the will. We no longer even fight, we just give into the fleshly craving that we have, because who are we to tell our bodies what it wants right? We are not carnal by nature, but simply higher beings responding to the call of nature right? There is no emotion in sex, it is simply an act that I do to extract the pleasure I desire for my own satisfaction. That is a terrifying thought to me, that we would degrade ourselves to the animals. Were we not created for more than this? I believe the answer is a resounding YES! As I have stated earlier this is simply the consequences of sexual immorality which defined is NOT confined to simply physical acts. Our minds are important. Our hearts are affected by our actions and thoughts. There are physical consequences for the physical acts we engage in, but even more importantly there are SPIRITUAL consequences that we must consider and be very afraid of. If you are a Christian you will not lose your salvation, that is not what I am saying. God is faithful to his word and the sacrifice of Christ has made atonement for the sins of the world and He (being Jesus) is given the authority to impute that perfect righteousness, that perfect holiness to those who will simply believe in him. What I am saying is that the spiritual consequences for those of us who already know God damage our relationship to him so much so that we will eventually walk away thinking he wasn't real or doesn't want us because we are so dirty. There is Hope! For all who would call on the name of Christ there is HOPE! First, confess to God what you have done. We must start with God, because he is always first in our lives. Next confess to another person what you have done. It is not easy to do this, but trust me, trust me, trust me, this is absolutely necessary to begin life change. You will be surprised to find that you are not alone. Start cutting out those things that tempt you. Remember, holiness is radical! It is not simply enough to say you want to change and then go on about your business. If you want things to change, you have to change some things! Make a list of the areas where you are tempted the most and share that with one other person and make a plan and ask them to hold you accountable to execute that plan. I plan to write at least one more installment on this subject. If you want to check out 1 Corinthians and compare their culture to ours. You will find it surprisingly similar. As always, if there is no one else that you can turn to, no one who you feel may understand, then message me. Tell someone, I beseech you.

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