Every time I think about what my life testimony would be, I realize how other people and experiences made me who I am today . I would like to share the story of Larry's Love and what it means to me.

When I first met my older cousin, Larry who was more like an uncle, it was in Fl in the 1980's. I was a young girl and had never been around anyone who drank. I think Larry was the first person that I had ever seen intoxicated and being a minister's daughter, I did not know quite what to make of it. The worst thing I remember doing at that age was tasting some beer that my sister secretly had obtained to put in our hair to make it curly. Well, there was also the time I got my sis in trouble for singing a certain Madonna song around my father, but this was the innocence I grew up with. I never really did anything bad and didn't know what to make of people who truly had problems.

However, Larry was more than someone who drank he had the most beautiful blue eyes and his fun loving ways were unforgettable. He would grab us girls and give us the biggest bear hug you could imagine. I would lose my breath and he would laugh at my bewilderment. He would never harm me, it was just his way of loving me. Of course, I went right back for more and I was ready to go fishing with him at any time.

It was hard for some people to look past the symptom of his drinking to see the real Larry. The real Larry did later try to put an end to the sufferings he was putting in the bottle as he did start giving it to the Lord. I will never forget on our front porch hearing him sing gospel hymns over and over. It was awful, because he could not sing worth a darn and I wondered why he wouldn't stop. I remember everyone thanking God he was outside making a joyful noise to the Lord. In fact, that was exactly what he was doing, doing it to the Lord, but I was unable to see that at the time. I just thought of him as ole Larry that couldn't hold a tune.

Then one Sunday, we met with the family at a church around Daytona. Larry had brought his sing along tapes and went up to sing. I thought, why is he doing this? As he preceded the most beautiful voice came out of him. I couldn't get over how he could sing and how much trouble he went through to learn how. I was in amazement at how he had trained his voice. I thought he might be thinking of starting a new career. My teenage mind thought, "If Vern Gosdin could do it, maybe Larry." I just still could not comprehend Larry's love for the Lord.

Later years, I married and moved to TN not far from where Larry was then residing in North GA. I had much need to talk to Larry about something, as my aunt had asked me to personally see about him. When I called, he was as chipper as he could be and so proud to be doing well as he had worked hard to get his life right. He was running a business and he was married to a beautiful lady whom he adored. There was no way I could discuss the situation with him over the phone. So, I thought I would try to see him in person about the matter.

The day never came for me to talk to him, instead news came that he was at a local hospital. I was the first of his family to arrive, I didn't know how bad off he really was. I went back through a trauma center passing by a man being rolled in while attendants were working on him. The man was already grey and the nurse and I bowed our heads as they went by. What I found ahead was just as bad for Larry. His frail body laid under the sheets and his appearance was far from being kept. It looked like he had worked himself into the ground. There were bruises on his head where they said he had fell. The doctor described that Larry had suffered a brain aneurism and later said that he was already gone.

The family gathered around his bed side in ICU and I was at his feet, tears came from his closed eyes as we prayed. How that could happen with the condition the doctors said he was in, I don't know, but tears did come. I struggled with many thoughts concerning Larry's life and his circumstances at the end. I so much wanted to have talked to him, but I think God knew what was best for Larry. He fought a good fight and is in a much better place as he did all he could to make peace in his life. For his funeral the family decided to play his songs he had recorded. The thought of it upset me very much. I prayed, "Please God, don't let me hear his songs"! Because this time his song was too beautiful to endure for sure.

I have shared the story of Larry's love because it means more than one thing to me personally. In that sometimes, struggles are something we die daily to and it is the willingness to change that God honors. During Larry's funeral, I was indeed unable to hear Larry's songs. I pray God gives me the strength to live life fully through Him, taking the bitter with the sweet and may I never give up trying. Most of all, may I never go deaf to hear the real music in one's soul.

Isa 64:6            &nb sp;               1Cr 15:31            &nb sp;             Rev 3:18